"I want you to write a paragraph from the point of view of an inanimate object."
Louise Doughty, A Novel in a Year
As I pull the knife from the victim's chest, I can hear the knife saying,
"How did I get here, this isn't what I wanted to do with my life in this kitchen. Now I am being stuffed in a plastic bag, and I will travel through the chain of evidence and finally end up in trial to convict some guy of murder. I just wanted a lazy life of cutting fresh bread or slicing my owners morning bagel. These groves on my blade were not meant to cut flesh, I am a bread knife for god's sake."